A Passionate Life

Years ago, when I was studying in France, I stumbled upon an older couple who were taking an evening stroll by the Eiffel Tower. My friends were waiting on line to ascend the monument, but I had already gone up in the past, and had chosen to take in the view from down below. The older couple was a pair of retired Parisians, Abdelkaber Bouderbala and his wife Elisabeth. As I recall, he was a retired doctor, and she was a retired teacher. Since bidding their careers "adieu", they both had proceeded to attend graduate school classes together and had acquired masters degrees in various ancient languages, architecture, and archaeology. Each evening, they walked arm in arm down the Champs D'Elysees and enjoyed watching visitors from all around the world marvel at their own Wonder of the World. Each evening, they celebrated time with one another, and shared discussions and silences while taking advantage of where they lived.

At that point in my life, I was at the beginning of an intellectual "coming of age". I had just finished my freshman year at Bryn Mawr, and was a little disillusioned with college. All throughout my life teachers had been telling me that the next level would be more academically challenging, and although I learned a lot in college and met wonderful wonderful lifelong friends (you know who you are!), I just wasn't feeling academically humbled in the way I yearned to. And although my group of friends was (most of the time) an active set of late teenagers, I was saddened by the "bubble-like" atmosphere of college, and frustrated by the general apathy around me--and sometimes within me.

Abdelkaber and Elisabeth became my penpals for several years after that chance encounter, and they inspired me more than I was ever able to tell them. That balmy June night in Paris reminded me that school learning isn't everything; the whole universe can be your classroom, and your classmates are the people you choose to surround yourself with. How you interact with the world and absorb the experiences of each day gives you more learning than the college diploma, or the eight masters degrees they had each acquired. I regained hope that night, celebrating my own insatiable curiosity while feeling less alone in the world. Ironically, that sense of peace probably opened me up to noticing other lifelong learners around me, and it was after my summer in France that my college friendships really began to blossom.

Anyway, yesterday I spoke to my parents and they had just returned from a lecture at Hofstra. I smiled and commented to my mother how glad I am that she goes to the shows and the poets' presentations and the political lectures and all the other events that are available around her. I am proud of her for researching what childhood experiences were critical for science fiction authors, and for getting up the bravery to speak to famous authors at SF conventions. I am grateful to both of my parents for surrounding me with learning and for modeling the lifestyle of learners. My life will never be boring. Thank goodness!

As I've said recently, some of my acquaintances don't understand my need to perform and create and rehearse and invent more tasks for myself... yesterday, in fact, a colleague asked me why I don't just rest at home and watch American Idol. I DO believe in resting, and have learned to love quiet. I DO believe in simmering down at the end of a day to a Scrabble game or a few minutes of the Colbert report, or private diary writing. I DO believe in going to my stream in the morning and getting my toes wet, or bringing my sketchpad and illustrating Spring's gifts of any given day. But I'm an artist and I need to perform. I'm an activist and I need to bring awareness about diversity to children. I'm a thinker and I need to read and interact and expose myself to so much of life. I'm lucky.

The best part of my luck is that I found role models as a child, as a teenager and now as an adult who also live wild, passionate lives. Some of these role models have been a part of every milestone in my life: they are family, or like family to me. Others are people I met for an evening, like my French friends. Some are people who know their impact on me, and even find it mutual. Others are folks who I watch from afar, with a respectful awe. I value my sense of passion, and don't usually feel like an odd duck because of it. Consequently, I have found friends who are passionate too. Some compose, some advocate wildlife, some teach, some are parents or lawyers or ice skaters. All of us have something to share; all of us make a point to live our lives with the aims of making the most of each day, and of making the world better each day.

I'm very aware of death this year; my youngest sister and grandfather have both passed away recently. I know our time on this planet is finite. I hope to live a long time, and create an awful lot more. There is so much to do, and so much to learn! However, I know that I have been lucky to live a full life, and to have rich, wonderful contacts with passionate people.