Loose Lips...Save Ships?

 They say loose lips sink ships. Unfortunately, if that saying is true to form, I am guilty of drowning many a Titanic passenger.

Let’s go back to first grade. It was Thanksgiving vacation and some lucky family had the honor of taking care of the class pets for all four days. That lucky family was mine, and said pets were Dinky and Stinky, two black-and-white rats.

I’m sure my parents weren’t too thrilled about housing rodents, but they agreed on one condition: the grandparents could not know.

That seemed fair enough, at least at first. Dinky and Stinky seemed at home on the neon green desk in my bright orange room. I delighted in watching them dig and claw at one another.

Just as all four grandparents arrived, however, disaster struck. I leaned on the desk— which was actually a door lying on two shelves— and it came tumbling down. I watched in slow motion as the glass home for my furry guests tumbled to the ground and the top opened. I watched two escapees scurry under my (messy) bed.

And I did what any self-respecting six-year-old would do: I screamed. “Mom! Dad! The rats are loose! The rats are loose!”

So much for keeping quiet.

I try to keep a low profile— really, I do!— but just as I couldn’t help but call the alarm all those years ago, I can’t help but share good news with people. If you’re holding a surprise party for someone, don’t tell me. If you want someone to know you care about them, let that news slip to me and before you know it, they will be either glowing or blushing.

About ten years ago, I realized this could be a liability. My friend had purchased surprise Broadway tickets for her daughter and two friends in honor of their graduation and I was joining along. Somehow, I was able to keep mum about that surprise. If I work really really hard, I can hide good news for awhile.

Similarly, even though I struggle with social anxiety, most people won’t believe it because I am quick to chat with people, even strangers. It’s a kind of overcompensation. One could argue that my gift with languages is linked to my desire to be helpful. In some twisted logic, I feel less awkward if I have a purpose (being helpful) and languages open that doorway. So does having the job of taking photos to document any event.

Consequently, sometimes I just end up sticking out. I thoroughly enjoy the older people who live in my parents’ community (I’ve always enjoyed the wisdom of age) and it seems that I can’t walk through the halls without starting several conversations. When Mom had only been there for a few weeks, people would go up to her and ask if she was “Emily’s mom” even though *she* is the resident there.

Now she worries— not because of rats or because of my chattiness and cheer. Rather, she worries because I’m outspoken about my values. I can’t shut up when it comes to human rights.

When I see people denied of their freedom without just cause, I rage. When I see people treated as less-than-human, I cannot be silent. When there is irreparable harm done due to abuse of power, I must speak up for the wronged. (I am better at speaking up for others than for myself.)

Loose lips sink ships, and maybe I need to learn better sense about timing and delivery. Maybe I can improve, like I did when keeping the secret about the Broadway trip and like I do when keeping my lips pursed about criticisms I’ve heard.

However, even though she’s worried, deep down I know Mom is proud of my activism. It had been thrilling to have her join me at rallies and to know that she spends her days calling senators and writing letters, too. I know *I* can only live with myself because I speak up.

My grandparents came in for Thanksgiving even with a few rats running loose in my bedroom. Nana even agreed to hold one (for about five seconds!) Loose lips didn’t really sink that ship. In fact, they got my parents to run upstairs and help me secure the rats and the desk.

They say loose lips sink ships. Sometimes that is true. But sometimes, we all need to speak up to keep a ship afloat. This weekend and April 5th, we began to see more people speaking up. We are not yet at 3.5% of the population— a statistic that is known for changing governments without fail. But we are well on the way there….

Keep speaking out!

(And, sorry, Mom! I’ll stay wise, though. Sort of…)